September, 2019

All kinds of predictions came in last year about this month. Huge transformations in our economic, geo-political, environmental and social structures were on the docket along with many other sublevels of change. Whenever things like this hit the consciousness waves that I tune into, I wonder what kind of impact will be had on human bodies.

My month started out with a sore throat that I couldn’t find. I tried all my old go tos, gargling, massage, lymphatic drainage, fasting, clean eating and nothing would touch it. My lips broke out into the meanest of cold sores that I have ever experienced. Next fatigue hit, my left shoulder went haywire and I felt like I couldn’t think a single thought without feeling like it was overwhelming. Making my morning coffee was blowing me out. I watched myself start my day and almost beg myself to stop moving. But I knew I needed to keep going. I wanted to go to work, I wanted to go to the pool, I wanted to play in my garden. But another part of me was just begging to stop. I had literally become split in my wants and needs. By mid-month, I reached a stalemate with myself and called in some frequency help. With help I was able to cleanup some distortions around splitting myself between present and future. Soon, the physical symptoms I was experiencing calmed way down.

Many of you have heard me talk about confirming what you don’t want when it comes up in your present. When our incoherent frequencies are deeply rooted in lineage and collective patterns, opportunities for confirming what we don’t want can range from the incredibly subtle to the grandiose. It’s kinda like the universe is tapping us on the shoulder and saying, “Are you sure you don’t want this, I just want to confirm. Here’s your opportunity to show me we are on the same page.” Well, both happened for me.

First, I wanted to take a pop-up class in San Francisco which required me to arrange for doggie daycare. I put two calls out and went with the first response. I know that my regular dog sitter gets upset when I don’t use her services so I made up a story that my class was cancelled. Basically, I confirmed the deleted pattern of people pleasing in the opposite direction that I want to go. No big deal, right? Wrong. Three days later I was contacted by a scammer that tapped into my deepest fears and posed as local law enforcement. He knew everything about me and the Sonoma County Sheriff's Department. It all was very convincing...except I kept tapping into my higher self which said to me, "I've got you." Plus, my body went into complete lock down; stomach clinching, nervousness, confusion. Many times, during the three-hour experience, I thought "This isn't right". But I pushed forward with the scammer’s requests.

As I was loading payment cards at Safeway, a very kind store clerk said, "Ma’am, I'm nearly 100% certain that you are being scammed". That's when the internal brawl broke out. I didn't want to be wrong, but I also didn't want to be right. And all the sudden it hit me, everything I have ever asked for around knowing my higher self has my back was being shown to me and I was STILL arguing with it!? What ensued in the next 48 hours was a life review. It was what many near death experiencers describe at the end of their lives before coming back. I saw experiences way back into my childhood and the building blocks that led to patterns of lack of self-trust, pedestalizing authority, overriding my body’s messaging, self-righteousness and, my personal favorite, irrational fear. After cleaning up these distortions by confirming what I want, the realization flooded my being with “Wow, I asked for the fast track, and I got it!” I am so aware that none of this stuff I was clearing is me, my original human blueprint, but I needed a pretty solid, in your face example, in order to actively confirm that I no longer want to host those frequencies. And I became clearer and clearer the benefit of this experience was showing me where I need to fine tune my focus.

None of this was easy for me but it is a clear example of the frequency work, how it impacts the body and the importance of being present. The “how” of the way this plays out for each of us is different, but the general deletion of distorted frequencies, confirmation of those deletions, and moving forward into a more authentic self are pretty much the same. What a month indeed!